im sick of waking up and not being snoop dogg
(via schrodingersbutt)
[Flash 10 is required to watch video]
(Source: yepperoni, via decimatedreams)
the common sense guide to surviving the zombie apocalypse:
So, in the wake of reading this terrifying shit, Postcard and I started chatting, as you do, about the zombie apocalypse. Here are some things Postcard and I enjoy: zombie media, common sense, and YELLING ABOUT STUFF. Thus, for your reading pleasure, please enjoy our simple twenty-step guide to NOT DYING in the unlikely event that a zombie apocalypse ravages humanity:
- IN THE EVENT OF AN ACTUAL APOCALYPTIC SITUATION, ASSUME THAT THE FOLLOWING THINGS ARE GOING TO STOP WORKING: running water (this includes toilets); anything that relies on electricity (this includes gas pumps); anything that relies on natural gas lines (this includes gas stoves/central heat); basically, anything that relies on there being a factory of some variety at the other end of thing you want to make do stuff. THAT’S ALL GONNA BREAK. THIS INCLUDES THE INTERNET. Thus, the most important thing to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse is:
- RESEARCH. For as long as you possess the internet, do everything you can to learn as much as possible. Research edible/medicinal plants (or seriously, go into a bookstore and loot your shit a guidebook, they’re not large, they sell little tiny ones, you can put it in your pocket, WHY DOES EVERYONE IN EVERY ZOMBIE MOVIE NOT DO THIS). Research, from available information, how the zombies work/which of their senses are functional—for example, if they operate largely by smell, you want to work on smelling not alive. If they operate largely by sight, DON’T LIGHT FIRES AT NIGHT. And speaking of fires…
Freedom Bucket
When I was in preschool there was this really weird system of time-out where they’d put you in this giant plastic bucket sort of like this one:
And the rule was you couldn’t leave the bucket for ten minutes.
In case you didn’t know, I was what the teachers referred to as a “difficult child” which is code for “walking entity of sass” so I was in the time-out bucket quite a bit.
Once they put me in the bucket for thirty minutes— and I thought that was incredibly unfair so I grabbed the handles and shifted my body repeatedly until the bucket and I were out of the classroom, in the hallway, and through the front door. They found me in the parking lot scooting to freedom in the time-out bucket. The teachers were furious and I said, “Hey, I never left the bucket”
So they called my mum and told her what I did and she just said, “Well, he never left the bucket.”
One time, Gatsby punched me in the face. It was awesome.
One time he met Warren G. Harding on a train, and he told him he was pretty.
I hear he does car commercials… In West Egg.
I hear his self-esteem’s insured for 20 dollars.
I hear his shirts are so beautiful… People cry over them.
(Source: mcavoys, via meetmeinmonroeville)
Guys Ten couldn’t carry the Olympic torch
if he did Donna would see it on television, recognize him and thus her mind would burn up.
Eleven has realized this and thus he’s now carrying it to save her life.
He’s got it under control.
(via goldenheartedrose)
oh my sweet fuck i love united states of tara.
HOW.
HOW DID I NOT KNOW THAT THERE ARE 3 SEASONS OF A TV SHOW WITH BRIE LARSON ON NETFLIX INSTANT.
Tooling around in Photoshop instead of tidying things like a responsible adult? DON’T MIND IF I DO.
→ prints
always reblog
(via wantedplantlife)
